Thursday, April 27, 2017

Hair and Eye Color - Two Decades of Frustration Due to Society

Hello-Hello! I am here to write another random post because all my life (so far) I felt a lot of pressure from the phrase "blond/e with blue eyes" from people around me, mass media and, finally, books. When I was little, I always had a grudge against "blonds with blue eyes" even though they did not do anything to hurt me. I was just sick and tired about this over glorification of these recessive traits. "Blond/e with blue eyes" were represented as the holly grail of looks in the society I lived my first years of my life. In my child's mind, it was not fair - pun intended - because the majority of people I saw, including myself, did not possess such looks... And on top of that, they were beautiful despite having dark hair (shades of black/brown) and dark eyes or green. 
I was even more puzzled when people will go to hell and back to dye their hair yellow - ups - blond.
This so called grudge of mine - although, it was more of a frustration really - did not take long.
"Why," you ask.
Because of (and Thank God for that): 
  •  my mother and her side of the family. We all - most of us - have dark complexions (hair and eye and sometimes skin too) and did not glorified these traits;
  •  my brain, which kind of blends in with my home education or brain development ignorance, who - who or which... Ok, grey area... no intentional pun intended pun... and now I am just playing with words... - discarded the looks and analyzed a person as a whole, body and personality;
  • a Romanian tradition, which consists of cutting sections of a toddler's hair and keeping it for the rest of ones life, I discovered I was once too a blonde just like in those epic description in the books;
  • last but not least, my childhood friends and some family members who possessed both or just one of these two traits and were normal nice human beings.
All of these made me realize that it was not the blond girl's or blue-eyed boy's fault for being considered standards of beauty. They were victims - even though they got the better end of the stick, kidding - of pop culture just like myself. They were not to blame. Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. And pop culture is to blame. It pushes innocents like my child self into a negative zone of hatred and discrimination.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. It hurt even more when people would bring religion into play and say that even angels were/are "blond with blue eyes." If you live in a religious country/community you can understand how this affected a child. "Oh, look! Even the All Mighty prefers blonds with blue eyes! Not cool! Not cool!" I was feeling inferior for a moment then
Mulan meme dishonor on you, dishonor on your cow meme
I am glad I was able to overcome this society induced aversion against "blond/e with blue eyes." People are more than just looks. From my own experiences, I learned to accept, like, and love the humans in my life regardless of looks.
Even though I did not have the urge to make the face below and stick my tongue out anymore, I still have metaphorical scars in a good and bad ways.
cat death stare meme
Because of this:
I decided to never - as in longer than a 24 hour period - dye my hair unless I have grey/white hair and I want to have my natural hair color again. From time to time I still find myself thinking, "Why are people changing their hair color? What's wrong with natural?" And weirdly, I get this immediate negative feeling while reading a book when is revealed that the main character is either blond/e or blond/e with blue eyes. And it gets even worse when the author keeps rubbing it in my face. It is an involuntary reaction which makes me roll my eyes and reimagine that character the WAY I want.
The reverse happens when rarely - in my opinion, I did not read all the books in the universe - I found a book with a protagonist - especially female - who has dark eyes and brown hair. That explains why I loved Twilight so much!
We need more representation in this world. Stereotypes have a bad influence on innocents' minds especially during development. Saying that one thing is beautiful than another one... Not helping. I am sure that my "blond/e with blue eye" example is not the only one causing the similar problems.
In case it was not clear, I have nothing against blond hair and blue eyes. I, myself - I feel the need to emphasize ME - though of a couple of blond/e with blue eyes people attractive. And if it happens to posses one or both of these traits my dear reader, do not feel guilty or insulted. That was not my intention. Now, I find it ridiculous to ever have a grudge against a few alleles. :D

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